Tuesday, June 5, 2018

Fistula / Hemdale split 7" review

Fistula / Hemdale 
Fistula / Hemdale Split 7"
Patac Records
Release date: Friday, June 8th 2018

When you first pick up a guitar, first hit the snare drum with your stick, or yell into a microphone, your youthful, naive goals might be to be adored for making fantastically original music, loved by all. To hear the Cheap Trick crowd from "Live at Budokan"  as you play the music from your soul. The goals usually are not to be considered "miserable". 

Fistula, have released this split 7", to (and I quote) "cerebrate 20 years of their miserable existence. To commemorate the occasion, FISTULA is releasing a split 7” with the legendary Ohio Death/Grind institution HEMDALE. Down-tuned assaults of volume and mental illness."

Of course I don't know if they meant to type "cerebrate" or "celebrate" so I looked up "cerebrate", which is defined as:


So I have visions of Fistula as young kids... "Santa, can I have a guitar for Christmas? I want to one day cerebrate my miserable existence in a band named after (fistula) an abnormal or surgically made passage between a hollow or tubular organ and the body surface, or between two hollow or tubular organs..."

Fistula contribute "Whore Cancer". The appropriately brutal sludgecore song is about a record label exec who planned on releasing a Fistula record and then, well I'll let Fistula tell you what happened next... "Then all was quiet until a hilarious, 40-minute emasculated rant appeared on YouTube. In this video, he starts a bonfire to burn all of his label’s releases and slandered just about anyone you can think of from his roster. The insane ramblings contained in that YouTube rant were then regurgitated into the lyrics of ‘Whore Cancer.'"

Someone please send me a link to this video on YouTube.


And the young Hemdale kids... "Mom, I wanna learn how to play guitar. I want to make music that is described with the words "assault" and "mental illness".

Hemdale contribute the death, grindcore, insanity, bludgeoning song "Miley" to the 7". A fitting tribute to the love of Miley Cyrus, and the fascination with her career path, the "Phoenix rising from the ash of the Hannah Montana show with talent and grace that can't be stopped".

Well, these young children from Fistula and Hemdale have succeeded as wildly successful merchants of misery and chaos. Their ear assaulting hybrid of metal, hardcore, sludge, death, grind is entrancing, and simultaneously ugly and beautiful. Thank you for sharing your lunacy. 

First pressing:
100x Clear vinyl
400x Pink vinyl with White splatter
15x Pink vinyl

I'm so glad this record has been released. 

I hope your childhood dreams came true too. Just like the Fistula and Hemdale kids. 

Cheers,
Frank FOE

Patac Records FB
Hemdale FB
Patac Records

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